I remember earlier this summer when I was at Young Life camp, I thought to myself how I would make a great YoungLife wife. I love the lifestyle, I would be great at supporting a guy living out Gods call for his life through high school ministry and I would love to raise my future children in this kind of a household. God must have been giggling at me as I dreamed up my silly little future plans. I picture him thinking: "oh girl, you don't even know what I have planned"
Push comes to shove and my perfect little plan that I had for my personal life, staying at the hotel, working hard, getting promoted, being successful in this industry I have studied for the last four years was coming to halt. What once has been fun and desirable now felt like an exhausting and soul sucking future. I still continued to work hard because this was the easiest way for me to support myself when I graduate in 8 months. (yikes) However I felt God beginning to tug at my heart strings. It was a slow pull. First I started wondering how I could find a career that would allow me to continue volunteering. Thinking about what position in a hotel would let me have weeks off for summer camp, nights off for club and Bible study. That's a joke. I knew I wasn't suppose to give up this part of my life though.
When I am with my high schoolers, or with my leadership team, or praying about those things, I feel that my life is purposeful. That I am living inside of Gods desire for my life. That being said I am sure you can guess where God has led me. Sometime in between Summer Camp, and The beginning of school God put a different future in my heart so strongly that I couldn't bear to run away this time. I had always thought that in order to lead ministry one has to be perfect and poised, well spoken and outgoing. I am none of those things, I am goofy, my words never come out right and my shyness always beats out the outgoing bursts within me. What God is teaching me now however, is that God hasn't called me to a leadership role, he has called me to a follower-ship role. A role where I am going to have to fully devote my life to following Christ and through that, there's a chance others may want to follow God too. I can't think of a time in my life where I have been more terrified and excited at the same time I have no idea what the future looks like now, but I cant wait to see how God writes this story.
